Have you ever noticed how some people are easier to shop for than others? Why is that? What present would someone think of buying you for your birthday? People with strong personalities who reveal a lot of information about themselves are easy to shop for. Revealing tidbits of information about yourself over time is how you paint a colorful picture of your character. Shy people, who keep their thoughts and personalities hidden, are more difficult to shop for. That’s why they end up receiving generic gifts like sweaters, candles, and bath products every year for Christmas.
The first time someone meets you, they only see a blurry image of you. They don’t know much about you. Your goal is clarity—help them see you better. The more context someone has, the more they’ll get out of every piece of information you offer. The more someone knows about you, the more comfortable they become speaking with you and the easier conversation becomes for them as well. Others can more confidently reference or introduce certain topics because they can infer how you would feel about those topics.
Help put people at ease and get rid of your cloak of mystery and the invisible barriers that exist between you and others. Conversation will flow more easily when your conversation partner knows more about you.
For more tips and techniques, check out my new book How to Make Small Talk Like a Boss.
Stay social, my friends.